Just came back from a depressing flight from Amsterdam.
my work was sub-standard, and i got zapped, lectured, criticised, blamed and scolded throughout the trip there and back.
Instead of working better, my work got worse n worse.
As i think back, i feel so demoralised as I think I can't even do the simplest of things even after flying so almost two years. I don't foresee myself getting better in any way. I look at my fellow colleagues, and wonder how they do it; how they get so good in their work, and not bang stuff, and drop stuff, and get in other people's way like I do; how come they are not clumsy[like me], don't get bullied[like me]; how come they ensure that people don't take advantage of them when I keep doing stuff for people, hoping that it makes them happy so that they can like me. I try so hard to be nice but I keep getting stepped on instead. I work so hard, but it's never enough. I will never be good at my job.
I think I was born a doormat.
I cannot be mean to people n ask them to do stuff for me; I can't bring myself to fight back cos it seems so hostile.
Why can't we all just get along?
Why do they have to be so mean to me?
Why can't people just like me?
I don't feel like flying anymore.
No comments:
Post a Comment