thanks you for offering me encouragement and advice throughout this difficult period.
just one thing i think you guys are not clear about...
no matter how pathetic i make myself seem, how miserable i might appear, please get one thing straight.........remember, as i mentioned in my posts...I caused it.
i did a great wrong to him thats why he is so undecided right now. i dismissed him heartlessly even though he tried for 5mths to desperately try and win me back. it was until he totally gave up hope on me and left did i realise that i wanted him back....selfish huh....
of cos i dun admit that everything is totally my fault lah.....i left cos he was too demanding.......and now, im so miserable because he is so undecided and i feel like i'm dangling in mid air, unable to go up or down. he has also changed; not as caring as before, unable to give 100 per cent. His bad.
why do i want to go back, you ask me? why when he seems to be playing around with my feelings?
its because he really is very very nice to me, and he really really loves me, despite all that has happened.
so try not to keep saying him ok? no relationship is smooth-sailing right?
i know you care. thanks peeps, for helping me get through this period and lending a listening eye. =)
update: i did a bit of rewording, cos the comment made me realise i wasn't clear in what i was trying to say. thanks for making me realise, unknown commenter.
4 comments:
sounds
confusing....
contradicting....
cause u were the one who wrote everything on the blog about him and nothing else recently.
he has affected u a great deal.
maybe u have sorted out your thoughts... maybe u just needed to rant it out here...
only god knows what u are really up to.
what used to be may never be the same anymore.
imagine a broken vase, once broken, its cracks will still be visible forever no matter how good it's been glued together.
the ultimate decision is yours. be it for better or for worst, u just have to face it.
hey,
i do need to rant; doesn't everybody?
but i also know when to admit if i have done wrong too.
its been a long period of pushing the blame, loud outbursts and self-denial.
it takes two hands to clap, and anything wrong in a relationship usually involves both being at fault.
i have been very confused lately, struggling with thoughts and feelings that have invaded my life; but i try to recognise what i've done wrong too.
thanks, i know you care. and i appreciate it.=)
yesh, definitely, everyone needs to rant and this is the best place to rant it all out.
i believed u've went through alot of mind knocking and heart searching before u finally came to your senses and got decided on what u really wanted.
i do not know how that guy is to u, i simply found your blog interesting to make me wanna peep in now and then.
still i feel sorry that this is how your guy treats u. i can deem him unworthy of your love, but i know that i only know one side of your story. like u say, it takes 2 to clap and there is no relationship without problems.
still, u have to protect yourself and not get hurt deeply in the end just because of one guy. he has to face it eventually on who he really loves.
i hope his final decision is u, truely...
thank you, thank you so much! =)
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